overheard

Boy: Do you like apples?
Random Girl: errrm yea sure why?
Boy: How about I fuck the shit out of you? How D'you like dem apples?
Random Girl: You're a dick

Girl walks off.

Boy to girl: I am going to make you feel so special, like a princess. Like Diana, but alive.

i could waste my entire life on sites like these, people are fucking hilarious.
i'm hungover again. my cat is making weird noises in his sleep next to me, it's quite cute. i don't know where my parents are but i wish they would get home & bring me food, i feel like i'm dying. this weekend has mainly been about;
drinking whisky with my cat, watching donkey punch (alone), weird food markets in faversham, being snowed in, unexpected texts, going to south wimbledon for festive fun, east 17 & mulled wine, terrifying human pyramids of death, NOT snorting custard, showing off my beautiful tattoo to the world, hungover train journeys, learning the beauty of the riverside dance, lady gaga christmas tree on repeat, reunited with my girls, vinegar wine at postie, ridiculous flirting, not remembering tap n tin having wanted to go there for so long, accidentally having a text argument with someone but not remembering why, still being drunk in the afternoon the next day. it's definitely the holiday season!!